Parenting a tween is not for the faint of heart.
I always assumed I’d be a stellar mom at this stage of the game. Hubby and I are wired for youth ministry and so I thought this would be my shining moment in motherhood.
Not so much.
Darling daughter and I are learning to tango in these preteen years and we step on each other’s toes, a lot.
We assume the other doesn’t really care about what we have to say. We trip.
We raise our voices in frustration. We stumble.
We both want our way. We fall.
Then we pick ourselves back up and try again. We are committed to improving our dance as mother and daughter.
We have breakthroughs. We say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me.” We snuggle and we remember all the ways that we love each other.
But it isn’t easy.
Trust is a must in order to be led.
If Darling Daughter is going to learn to follow my lead and trust my heart than she has to feel that her heart is safe with me.
If I brush her off or blow up, she will withdraw and second-guess letting me in.
If I am going to thrive as a mom, during these tween years, than I need to let God redirect my methods as I trust that He can get us through this time of transition.
I need to trust that He loves us both and knows how to help when we get tangled up in big emotions and misunderstandings.
I need to learn to follow His lead and trust His heart, knowing that my heart is safe with Him.
I can’t find my approval in her responses.
I can’t look for validation in her behavior.
As I let the Lord assure me of His approval and validation, through Christ, then she and I are both free to move forward in a healthy manner.
It starts with trusting that Jesus is enough for me, for her, and for us—as mother and daughter.
Trust is a must in order to be led. And I want to follow and lead well.
I’m over at Kelly Balarie’s blog, Purposeful Faith today as we Learn to Tango with a Trustworthy Partner.
Casey says
Thanks for posting this, it was a much needed read for me. My daughter is approaching tween years and we have been going through the same.
Katie says
Glad I’m not alone Casey. It’s a challenging time for sure but such an important one. Hugs!
Dana says
Katie, I am raising 2 teenage girls right now and SOOO hear you loud and clear and agree.
Keep pressing on mama, more wonderfully challenging days are yet to come!
Katie says
Thanks Dana- pressing on indeed! 🙂
Christy Mobley says
So good Katie. It goes for daughter-in-laws too. I’ll have to write on that one. You’ve inspired me!
xoxo ~
Katie M. Reid says
For sure Christy!