Sometimes when you are going through a trial it can be easy to lose sight of how loved you really are.  Recently, I was reminded by God of a few precious things…

#1)  You are not forgotten. 

On Valentine’s day, our dear friend and adoption mentor, Deb, sent me this message:

Dear Katie- May
this be your last Valentine’s Day without your sweet baby in your
arms.  Praying always….I can feel your ache in your arms…I have felt
it too.  Soon, you will be fulfilled, soon.

You can imagine how much these words touched me and met me right where I was.  Filled, soon- our arms.

God has not forgotten us.  He knows where we are and where baby is too; at this very moment.  After getting several calls, out-of-the-blue, about babies being born and needing families right away, it is exciting to think that it could happen like that for us too.  Is that how Abraham and Sarah felt, or Zechariah and Elizabeth?  So much waiting and then “Bam!  Hello, here’s the one you’ve been waiting for.  Right here, in flesh…see, I can do anything?  Nothing is too difficult for me.  My ways are not your ways.  I am. You are not forgotten.”

The lovely niece of our good friend Leigh; isn’t she sweet?!

#2)  He (still) works miracles.

The other birth we have been waiting on, besides our adoptive one, is a “ministry baby”.  Almost a year and a half ago God started stirring a new thing in us, to move back to a place we had previously lived, to do church youth ministry, and potentially start developing a Christian camp from the ground up.  So, we really have been waiting on two babies; maybe twins?  We feel really pregnant, almost overdue perhaps, and ready to labor and deliver.
 

Nehemiah 2:18b “Let
us arise and build.” So they put their hands to the good work.”

We are indeed moving next month and are really excited about this new chapter and adventure in our lives.  However, it is a bit bittersweet; we will miss dear friends here and we have felt like our baby was here also.

Because we have felt like our baby is here, we really like our caseworker, and have had such a good experience with our adoption agency office, we were hoping that we could stay with them and not have to transfer to another branch (closer to our new home).  We requested this, but for some good reasons, were told that we would need to transfer.  I have to say, through God’s grace,  I handled this hard news pretty well.  I cried when I heard the news, but, I took some deep breaths and worked to accept yet another bend in the road on our adoption journey (side note:  I get nauseous on winding roads, even though the view can be beautiful, and the drive exciting, my head and tummy are not big fans).

Then, out-of-the-blue, unexpectedly, on Valentine’s Day of all days, we received one of the bests gifts we could have gotten- our caseworker messaged us and said that the branch director would actually prefer that we continuing working with their office since we were happy with the services that we have received through them.  What?!  We were overjoyed!  It was more than just good news, we believe that God worked a miracle on our behalf.  It seemed like confirmation to how we were feeling; that our baby was here.  We are still rejoicing over this surprising and wonderful turn of events.

Psalm 126:3  “The LORD has done great things for us and we are filled with joy.” 
 

#3)  He is continually showing us His love (we overlook those things, and Him, when we stop seeing and seeking).  It may not have been the wisest choice, but it was very cleansing to cry my eyes out for two hours as I watched, P.S. I Love You, by myself the other day.  A story of love, loss, and learning how to live with loss.  I was a mess… in a good way.  It made me want to be much more present and thankful for the moments I have with my family.  And, it also reminded me of something I was starting to forget.- The Lord is always showing He loves us, all around.

I can hear the responses coming back at me through the screen, “How can you say that, look at all the evil in the world!”  “If He is loving then why did this _________ happen?!”

All I know is that He is who He says He is.  You can take Him at His Word or you can walk away- He has given you that choice; lovingly.  He will not force you to love Him in return; but because He is holy and just, in addition to being loving, there are consequences for not believing- there has to be or He is not holy and just too.

Check out this list of scriptures on God being “compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in love and faithfulness.”

Now, back to my original point, the Lord reminded me that He, like Gerry’s character in the movie, is reminding me of His love continually (through His Word, through Creation, through knowing the things that make my heart sing, through friendships, through gifts, through surprises, through hard lessons).  I had forgotten that He doesn’t stop loving and telling me so, it is me who stops looking or listening, or really seeing that love.  Sometimes we just see the hard (and maybe have a tantrum or two) and miss that His love is there, always speaking.

And recently He brought me back, and reminded me of His love letters.  Where do we get these from?

His Word.  His very self; still speaking all this time.

 #4) His Word is to be held onto, to be savored, to be eaten.

I recently joined a Precept Bible Study (www.precept.org) on Isaiah (Part 1), and have been so blessed and greatly challenged- why did I take such a long break from inductive study?  I have been missing out!  This is a powerful way to know Him, to stay closer to Him, to be kept from wandering away…

Isaiah 5:12b-13  “But they do not pay attention to the deeds of the Lord, nor do they consider the work of His hands. Therefore My people go into exile for their lack of knowledge; and their honorable men are famished, and their multitude is parched with thirst.”

John 6:35-36  “Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe.”

Jeremiah 15:16  “When your words came, I ate them; they were my joy and my heart’s delight, for I bear your name, Lord God Almighty.”

Jesus. He is the Word, the bread from heaven, our daily manna, the food that sustains and fills, and leads us through the desert; through times of deliverance and times of wandering- He is present, speaking, “P.S…I love you.  I wanted to remind you again- I have given you everything- My Son, My Love, My Word – everything you need for life and godliness through your knowledge of Him who called you by His own glory and goodness (2 Peter 1:3).”

God, please forgive me for neglecting Your Word, for being “wise in my own eyes, and clever in my own sight” (Isaiah 5:21), for not remembering how important it is to read your love letter(s) continually…to have open eyes and heart to Your love, Your miracles, Your Holiness, You- the Holy One of Israel.  Thank You for the gift of Your Word; the best Valentine’s Gift to date.

Deep Breaths:
Look over the #1-#4 statements again.  Does one of them particularly resonate with you?  How so?  

Read Hebrews 11:6  “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.”

Take some time today to diligently seek Him.

P.S. He loves you.